oh well...

i don't like it.. but it'll just have to do for now won't it?
there's only so much i can do..
sw's right.. you choose a path from the 2 choices before you... but there'll always be a small part of you that lingers on the edge of the other path... wondering what it would have been like if you went down that one..

haii.. hate this screwed up feeling... cannot!

arc rehearsal is tomorrow.. die.. so tired... having problems sleeping nowadays =/ ... slept at 5.30am last night and woke up at 8.40am? geez... fell dead asleep on the 171 bus ride to town, the nel ride to xiuqi's house at night and on the bench at the punggol lrt station... i'm falling asleep everywhereeee!!!! ARRRRRRRRR! everywhere but my own bed!!! Ah this sucks...

at least beijing documentary is beginning to look promising... mmmm...

here's the song... ah it's driving me nuts... maybe it's the reason i can't sleep lol... are there really such things? so simplistic... but so perfect? ahhh i wish.. i wishh....

*Now Playing Andrew Lloyd Webber's Phantom of the Opera piece - All I Ask of You*

hmmm..

ahhhhhhh so rush.. gotta do beijing proposal, live-feed shot list and prepare live-feed documents to mass send to the crew before rehearsals... i gonna diee.. think i shall be good samaritan like sem 1 and print out all the stuff for everyone hurhur..

"ehh dunno leh.. my printer just printed out another 12 copies leh.. i don't know whyy... so lucky right? class got 13 people jsut nice print out that mount? macham strike 4d right?"
*act blurrr, while smiling sheepishly*

haha...
yay free dinner tomorrow!
cheerleading people got appreciation dinner and video crew (jj, lam, singwei, xiuqi et moi!)
hurhurrrr.. who doesn't like free dinners?

went back to sign up for driving this time as a student... if i can pay another $151+ to skip 2 months of waiting i will.. now all i have to do is take a "trial" basic theory test on april 8th before they'll let me take basic theory and start learning how to drive! =D *excited like hell*

hmmm just ate 4 packs of kinder bueno (lol i'm gonna go all jazzy tomorrow you can betcha money on that one...) need my comfort food.. think i shall buy a large tub of ice cream and endulgeee ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...........

hmm gotta wakey early tmr.. like 830 get ready go school reach by 1030.. check out Live-feed equipment and put in convention centre... oh boy have we got our work cut out for us tomorrow..

whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?

Phantom of the Opera

just watched phantom of the opera the movie yaya... love it.. enchanting stuff... thinking of going to catch the musical opening soon.. expensive tickets thoughhh.. hmm but still i wanna watch it! =(

Past the point of no return, no backward glances.
Our games of make belief are at an end.
Past all thought of if or when
No use resisting,
Abandon thought and let the dream descend...

Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime.
Lift me, Save me from my solitude.
Say you'll want me with you here beside,
Anywhere you go, let me go to!
That's all i ask of you!

haiii.. feel so weird after watching it lah.. tsk... feel so content.. but feel so emo also.. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WTH?!
i shall find people with $ to waste accompany go watch hurhurhur argh?! where's my sister when i need her...tskkk..

signed up for driving theory test le.. but it's gonna take a long while... June 4th then can take the test.. tskkk so long.. *irritated*

had a little fight with mum again.. over the same fucked up thing.. ah this has to end soon.. please just let it end soon.. i forsee i'll be spending alot of time with my earphones in my ears watching films as long as i'm at home....

No more talk of darkness,
forget these wide-eyed fears.
I'm hear nothing can harm you,
my words will warm and calm you.
Let me be your freedom,
let daylight dry your tears.
I'm here with you, beside you,
to guard you and to guide you.

Say you'll love me every waking moment,
turn my head with talk of summer time.
Say you'll need me with you now and always,
promise me that all you say is true.
That's all i ask of you.

Let me be your shelter,
let me be your light.
You're safe no one will find you,
your fears are far behind you.

All i want is freedom,
a world with no more night.
And you, always beside me,
to hold me and to hide me.

Then you say you'll share with me one love one lifetime,
let me lead you from your solitude.
Say you'll need me with you here, beside you.
Anywhere you go let me go too.
That's all i ask of you.

Say you'll share with me one love one lifetime,
say the world and i will follow you.
Share each day with me each night, each moment.
say you'll love me (you know i do)

love me, that's all i ask of you...

they lied when they said the good die young!!!

this is where it gets exciting =D
Live-feed concert this sunday... can't wait to get into the convention centre with the whole Aurora crew woooo gonna be amazing...
Last game against Nhac-Tre this sunday as well.. hyped up for one of the most hardcore encounters i'm ever gonna have in my life lol.. *IMAGINE!* maosi, up against angmohs (from finland and sweden i think) taller than him by a head? with shoulders broader than his two-fold? Lol... Sounds like another chance for me to do a bulldoze (lol dx...)

lost the game yesterday but it's okay... just see how it goes... people say you must learn to lose first before you'll learn to win... hur. i've been doing alot of losing lol.. when are the wins gonna come? geeezzz

had another good sleep today.. till 2pm.. gotta start adjusting my body clock already lol 2 8am days and 1 9am day on my timetable basically means i've gotta be up around 6 *faints*..
I WANT MY VAN! lol

waiting for qammie, xq, jj, sw, lam to ring me up to see if we're gonna catch bean later... home is getting boring again lol... why? Because my movies are with sw!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! NNNNNNNO! wanted to have a little bit of cartoonish comedy last night and i realised... hmm where's my happy feet movie? NNNNnnnooooooooooooo! so i spent the rest of the time being a Fifa addict and ACCUSING PEOPLE!? (wait people? no lah.. just a PERSON *dunno who lehh?*)

lol gonna go import all the pics on my slr to aperture.. (DAMN ZAI! I LOVE APERTURE lol...)

-----

*Now Playing Anberlin - Godspeed* weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Burning down neverland (scatter the ashes)
White lines black tar the matches
Is this another death by misadventure
Tell me what you got, what you really got (hey hey!)
We’ll rest in our graves,
Lexington course your veins
Sleepers can't just wake the dead
When needles and lovers collapse on guilty beds

Fall asleep, don't fall asleep
Don't fall asleep

(They lied when they said that the good die young)

THEY LIED WHEN THEY SAID THE GOOD DIE YOUNG!
woah-oh-ah-oh
THEY LIED WHEN THEY SAID THE GOOD DIE YOUNG!
stay with me, stay with me tonight

Burning down bridges now (scatter the ashes)
Godspeed to all you're after
Is this a life left just to remember
Tell them who you were, who you really were (hey hey!)
Kill yourself slowly over time, fashion statement suicide
She's still asleep in a Chelsea hotel
Bad turns to worse, and the worst turns into hell

Fall asleep, don't fall asleep
Don't fall asleep

(God save the eyes that dim tonight)

THEY LIED WHEN THEY SAID THE GOOD DIE YOUNG!
woah-oh-ah-oh
THEY LIED WHEN THEY SAID THE GOOD DIE YOUNG!
Stay with me, stay with me tonight

WOAH-OH-AH-OH

THEY LIED, WHEN THEY SAID THE GOOD DIE YOUNG!
woah-oh-ah-oh
THEY LIED WHEN THEY SAID THE GOOD DIE YOUNG!
Stay with me, stay with me tonight
THEY LIED WHEN THEY SAID THE GOOD DIE YOUNG!
woah-oh-ahoh
THEY LIED WHEN THEY SAID THE GOOD DIE YOUNG!
Stay with me, stay with me tonight

don't you wanna be somebody?

the magnum force cheerleading ppl really got hit bad yesterday.. though i have no right to say i know how they feel (because i really don't), i think i can say that they really deserved better. but let's face it this place is cruel, time is cruel you don't really get second chances.. if you fall during your performance u might as well get up and make as much of it as you can.. it's cruel because people don't see how much you train.. they don't see how many bones you break.. your costumes, makeup and the smile you put on your face before you head out to perform is all that matters to them... but really at least there's a place in your heart where you keep it as a milestone in your life... they can take the trophy from you, but they can't touch that thing you've gained inside of you, your determination and pride...
if you saw the tears they cried yesterday, if you saw the looks in their eyes yesterday, you'd probably know instantly how much it really meant to them... comeon magnum! you'll get em' next year!

game later at 6... not sure if i've prep-ed myself enough mentally... hopefully i am.. i think i've gone through enough on court to stop the shivers that you'd normally get from something which you know there's no going back... once the firstwhistle is blown, once the first face-off is won or lost, you just gotta carry on luh.. no going back...
the ankle is holding up pretty alright.. the shoulder is too.. my legs feel ready for a good run..

lol i just saw battlefield 2142's amazing opening 'movie'... lol.. so tempted!!!
and gonna learn driving yay!
and gotta go an change or else i'll be late for the game and get scolded silly...
au-revoir!

tireddd...

pretty tired which is probably the source of my moodiness...
just came back from dinner and chillin' session with xiuqi, singwei and calvin at amk... lol it's becoming our usual hangout... laughed my ass off... really enjoyable yayaya =D...
tired because i went to training in school before meeting them.. yes that means i've gone to 2 trainings in 2 days... me arms and legs are aching bad... but still pretty fun.. i'm not gonna be crazy and go for tomorrow's millenia skools training at victoria school tomorrow.. that'll be nuts...
1. cause Skoools training is extremely extremely extremely tiring.. (yes dx this is probably where i got my sick stamina from)
2. cause victoria school is damn far away! (like 1 hour 15 minute journey and i've to change bus somemore! RAR!)
3. cause i'm really tired and i don't think i'll perform well enough in training to meet me coach's expectations of me... and i'll probably get scolded sily...
4. cause my shoulder is complaining a little =(
5. cause i think i just wanna rest tomorrow and get back my strength for the most bloody important floorball league game in my life so far this sunday... (dieeeeeeeeeeeee *dies*)
6. i wanna try battlefield 1942 on my mac (MUaHaHaAhAhAHaHa!)

lol
that pretty much sums it up... so tireddddddddd so tireddddddd...
not sure if i'm feeling emo... because i'm tired.....
i was searching today.. but i couldn't find it... might be a good thing...
and at least now i know the reason why there was a _____*Blanko*_____
but still yah.. i don't really know...
*random*
and i think horoscopes are stupid yesh.. because it's inaccurate..
*random ends*

howwww? :(

i wish i could simply say... "You teach me luh.." but no one can...

No i'm not emo.. i'm just tired.. okayyy i shall go shower and go to sleep...

i hate my stupid spoilt aircon! =( (DAMN HOT CAN?!)
i love my mummy (cause i think she made oreo cheesecake =D)
i love my pc speakers (it just sounds good... *gimme bass!! Gimme gimme!*)
i love floorball
i hate my veggies =P (What?!)
i hate my swollen left shoulder and my slightly sprained left ankle (owwie :( ...)
i love the song on my blog now (vocals damn nice weeeee!)
i love Churros! =D
i love mos burger's 'mos cheeseburger with chilli sauce' *smacks lips*

and all of your smiles, they're leaving, getting away from the field of white flowers...

bonne anniversaire maman =)

the 9 months that i was a 'work in progress" in your loving belly, you sang nice little lullabies (dun lie i know you did! =P) to send me to sleep, you "sayang-ed" your tummy as if u were "sayang-ing" me, you baked your lovely breads, cakes and pies with me, and you never failed to send some down for me to try *wink ;D*, you brought me to work to show me off to you colleagues at apple (was it?), and then more showing me off to your other friends.. and our relatives and yadayadayada... but you know.. truth is.. slightly under 33 years before i was "created" (through you know.. "that thing"...), you were pretty much like me.. you spent 9 months in your mama's belly, and she must have done things like those you did with me.. and today the 20th of march, we celebrate your first breath into this world.. i'm pretty darn sure you came like some killerly bright light (that i'm sure even a HMI light or even the sun for that matter couldn't match) into this world.
You lit your own path through you nice jog through life and even if people wouldn't admit that you've brightened their lives up, I'll admit mummy dearest, you've lit mine up pretty darn good.. you've always done your best to get sis, marky and me out of the dark.. always made sure we came first before anything... i remember how u gave my idiot p.1 chinese teacher a piece of your mind when you found out about the bad things he did to me hurrr.. (think he's needed hearing aids ever since Ha =D) and there's just so many things.. like when i was alone at home and all of you were in australia, you worried about me so much, about whether i was eating properly and everything that you cried (though u really shouldn't have cause i had everything under control lol.... i'm not your typical little boy okay?! lol)... yah...
basically i just wanna say

Happy Birthday Mummy dearest!! =D
lots of hugs, kisses, (oreo cheesecakes =X haha), and love from this tall, dark, gangly thing,
your son Mel... Je t'aime =)

-------

*Now Playing Copeland - Priceless*

I remember when I'd run to you
In field of white flowers
Your embrace is my air
How I needed you there
And all of the world and
All of it's powers
Couldn't keep your love from me no
Couldn't keep your love from me

Cause I need you
Like the dragonflies' wings need the wind
Like the orphan needs home once again
Like heaven needs more to come in
I need you here like you've always been

Then I waved goodbye to you
From a field of white flowers
You were so proud of me
I was too proud to see that
All of the world and
All of it's power
Couldn't keep your love from me no
Couldn't keep your love from me

Cause I need you
Like the dragonflies' wings need the wind
Like the orphan needs home once again
Like heaven needs more to come in
I need you here like you've always been

Taking for granted
(taking for granted)
And all of her smiles
Could not be reminded
You got away

And now I'm looking up to you
From a field of white flowers
You were so proud of me
I'm so proud of you
All of the world and
All of it's power
Couldn't keep your love from me no
Couldn't keep your love from me

Cause I need you
Like the dragonflies' wings need the wind
Like the orphan needs home once again
Like heaven needs more to come in
I need you here
I need you
Like the dragonflies' wings need the wind
Like the orphan needs home once again
Like heaven needs more to come in
I need you here like you've always been

La da da da...

-----

i'm trying....

peak...

it's the peak before the end...
a sudden rush of emotions triggered by my own stupidity and nosiness...
where's the fuckin' exit already!?!

-----





12th and Hyde on a Sunday
Feeling like we're grown
And we're nothing short of invincible

It starts again
Can you feel it
It takes your breath away
Stop saying that we're invincible
(it's round and round)
You're uninviting, unrewarding
And I'm misinforming you

We all want to be somebody
Right now we're just looking for the exit
This is the way I would have done things
Up against the wall
You've got me up against your wall

It's you and me on a Monday
The lies that we told
This is where we both go numb now
You broke my heart again this time
You're fading out, you crossed the line

We all want to be somebody
Right now we're just looking for the exit
This is the way I would have done things
Up against the wall
You've got me up against your wall

(reaching out for a hand thats not here, but you are here and im not...)

This is the way I would have done this
Up against your wall
This is the way we should have done
When we're up against a wall
Up against a wall

a dreammm =)

don't cry,
cause i'm always here with you.
don't be afraid,
cause i'm always here with you.
you don't have to hide yourself from the world,
you don't have to worry about anything,
you don't have to sit alone with all the painful thoughts and memories on the park bench anymore,
because i'm always here with you... =)

-----

i typed a killerly long post.. and blogger decided to screw with me and now the post is gone.. so i'm not gonna bother typing it out again lol.. Geeeeeeeeeez!
W
H
Y
?!

now i know, how to save my life..

how do you save a life?

Step one you say we need to talk
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
And you begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best
Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

-----

random but i remember when some of my course lecturers said something along the lines like,
"By the time u've done a semester with us, u won't enjoy films like you used to..."
i agree... after learning all the stuff they teach us we can appreciate more! :D
just watched "The Shawshank Redemption" just now.. (one of my favourite films of all time! :P) so niceeeeeeeeeeeee! RAR! *Loves Loves LOVES!*

there're some killer lines that i wanted to put up but i can't remember.. think i'm sleep.. my god it's 3:40am! 0.0

and watched 3/4 of this other show channel five screened after Shawshank... called "The Operator".... EEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeee hahaha bad bad bad...the plot was stupid.. lol.. and the lead male actor was stupid.. eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee... but there were good lines in it here and there.. haha.. the guy meets up with this pastor and he's looking for help cause his life is a mess (why? go watch it and u'll know why.. lol and u'll hate it just as much as i do.. lol :P) and the pastor says "Seek and ye' shall find" and the guy goes.. "but i'm not sure what i'm looking for..."
so mr.pastor tells him a little joke (i think some of you may have heard of it before.. -the movie was made in 2000-)
i don't remember it exactly but i'll try...
"There's this guy caught in a massive flood by a tree with the water level at his chest, the current is too tough for him to swim through it.. a log passes by him but he refuses to get on saying 'God will save me'... Now the flood waters have already risen a great deal forcing him to climb half way up the tree... a rescue boat comes by but he waves the boat away saying 'I trust in god that he'll save me'... A while later the flood has gotten so bad that he's had to climb to the tippy top of the tree and still the water is at his neck... A rescue helicopter drops a ladder to him but he refuses to reach for it... 'I have faith, god will save me from this flood'... he soon drowned... when he met god in heaven, he asked god "God! All my life i've been faithful to you, all my life i've followed your words. but why? why did you not come to save me?" and god told him "There was really nothing much more i could do for you, i did send you a log, a boat and a helicopter..."

yah luh that's it.. think i didn't get the effect though.. ah u get the point yah?
*lazyyy*

kk gonna go sleeep... match tomorrow at tampines.. at the worse possible timeslot.. 8pm match starts.. and it'll end around 10pm.. (there goes my evening.. rar!) and i'm gonna miss the phantom of the opera screening on channel 5! NOoooooo!!! *Hates*

bonne nuit!

i don't wanna live in fear anymore,
i don't wanna wake up afraid of what i'll find,
afraid of what might happen.
I don't wanna fear anymore....

still shaking inside...

going to singwei's at 3pm later cause peixian the virtuoso arts person needs to discuss about the live-feed thingum... hope it won't stretch too long then maybe can go meet ah lian and gang..

Welcome back Ah Lian! :D ( I want my present! :P)

i dun mind Kbox lol.. beats staying at home... but it's kinda expensive... maybe we can go another day when we can get the student price timing?

taking a chance... going to play in the Skools Innebandy vs Skools Floorball game tomorrow.. it's gonna be rough and tough because it's exactly like a derby game... the one time the club is actually split into 2.. there's really no mercy... yaya.. hope the shoulder will hold up...

might be going australia on the 2nd of april.. if i do go i'll miss the first 2 weeks of school...
i need the getaway.. lol.. hopefully luh see howw....

i just did the most amazing thing.. i found my original battlefield discs and i re-installed it into my pc... *searches for his big bulky glasses with thick frames*... i ish gonna become a bf2 freak agains.... hurhur... =P ...

wanna do so much but there are so many limitations.. rar...

k dunno wat i'm blogging bout anymore...

only heaven knows....

she's always on my mind,
from the time i wake up
'till i close my eyes
she's everywhere i go
she's all i know

though she's so far away
it's just keeps getting stronger
every day
and even now she's gone
i'm still holding on

so tell me where do i start
'cause it's breaking my heart
don't wanna let her go

chorus:
maybe my love will come back some day
only heaven knows
and maybe our hearts will find their way
only heaven knows
and all i can do is hope and pray
'cause heaven knows

my friends keep telling me
that if you really love her
you've gotta set her free
and if she returns in kind
i'll know she's mine

so tell me where do i start
'cause it's breaking my heart
don't wanna let her go

chorus

why i live in despair
'cause wide awake or dreaming
i know she's never there
and all these time i act so brave
i'm shaking inside
why does it hurt me so...

chorus

heaven knows

:')

a song on the way home..

if ever you're in my arms again,
this time i'll love you much better.
if ever you're in my arms again,
this time i'll hold you forever.
this time will never end...

-----

couple more weeks....

results...

u know.. i wanted to sleep till 1pm tday.. but i received a sms around 8.45am.. with my results....

so apart from swearing at the system, (cause they said it starts after 9am)
and being angry i didn't get AD for loc pro.. i'm pretty darn happy with my results.. :P

it's always nice to see you passed the 2 subjects u feared the most (namely writcomm and soc psych, with a C) and u maintained your gpa above 3.0 at 3.08 which is still pretty good considering this was a difficult semester... but the thing i'm most happy about... is........

AUDIO TECH GOT AD! LOL!
HAHAHAHAHHA!
Killer Notes onlyyyyyyyyyy!
WOoooooooo!
lol k i'm going a little crazy.. hahaha.. due to the lack of sleep...

Au-revoir people!

the brightest little firefly =)

feeling really happy now.. and i've no idea why... haha...
think i'l get sick tomorrow because singwei, xiuqi, jj and i got drenched in the stunningly heavy downpour just now..
lol want a picture? here's one for you in words..

Imagine....

singwei and mao hiding under a corner of SMU waiting for the traffic light to go green so we can cross the road to the Kopitiam for food..
Oh! There goes singwei mao following closely behind dashing out though the light's still red.. and it didn't change green though it should have! Our turn already leh! Off singwei goes across the road.. the first cars making a left turn onto that road slowed down for him.. but mao's still looking pretty blur.. (i mean 1 second singwei was beside him in the rain.. and the next second he was already on the other side looking back at mao)... and the cars just kept coming for like 30 seconds! mao's jsut stupidly standing out in the rain under a tree without much leaves, getting soaked through to his skin.. his hand in his pockets protecting his handphone and wallet from getting wet... and he didn't make a run back to SMU because he gave up trying to be dry after the first 5 seconds out in the rain.. ( I WAS THAT WET! lol!) then the traffic lights changed.. red on the road parallel to him.. and in 2 seconds the cars on the perpendicular road would start and he might as well have went for a dive in the sea... so he made a mad dash across to the other side *DASHES!* arriving safely (though not all that dry) on the other side, without having first made a fool of himself by running in the most peculiar fashion hahaha... (what can i say? i've got chopsticks for legs hahaha)

so crazy can?! my appreciation for the handdryer in the toilet has never been higher after today lol... so warmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm *relief*
but still soaking... tskkk..

we then went to arcade at dhoby awhile and mao learnt how to literally "Daytona Like Chiam!" (Lol sounds so dang marketable right? =P) hahahaha... they've fot his pretty good deal going for today and tmr (14th March).. u top up $20 to ur card and they give u another $20 free :D SO NICE RIGHT?! lol! my legs are still aching from all the daytona-ing and that funky shooting game that has sensors to detect you dodging left and right and ducking and all that lol amazing very fun! but tiring...... who wants to go with me again tmr? lol and can eat food and everything..

End year results coming out tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH! *Runs around in circles*... then again... i don't feel too nervous.. lol .... dunno why hmmm.. maybe it's all the arcade from just now.. and the fun i've been having lately =D...

Directing a Live-Feed show (something like singapore idol) on 1st april in ngee ann poly convention centre...
have any of you seen the 77th Street poster reading "ARC" competition? organised by Virtuoso Arts? the one that gets ppl to sing and all that.. yah yah.. anyone wanna come watch it? just let me know k? hurhur.. some of the singers are pretty good yaya..

think i shall sleep soon.. lol.. mad tired *yawwwwwwwwwwn... stretchhhhhhhhhhhh*
lol the skin on my shoulders and back is peeling lol... signs that the really bad sunburn is finally going away :D... yay! not pain anymore!

u never really left me :)
not for a second all this time...

it's gonna be a long night =/

yeahhh the title sums it all up basically...
capturing the 'ARC' prelim round footages for the arc ppl... tskk..
like 3 tapes of 40 minutes @.@
just started on my first tape.. (thankfully i've got my new 500gb hdd which i bought at the suntec IT fair lol.. *dance*...
bloody thing was insane... absolutely packed full of people.. some pretty impatient idiots actually..

went with qammie and jj.. and was worried bout qammie most of the time cause (i'm not suaning you! lol) she's pretty small size .. and there're really big people there (i'm not kidding o.o)
while we were queueing to buy our harddisks at this booth (which eventually told us they didn't have it pretty much wasting our time.. =/ *Shheeeesh!* this fatty came pushing through like some rugby player or something! trust me i mean every word when i say he's a stupid fat git...
tskk.. the idiots in this world... see qammie u've got such a caring friend here can?! (lol dun care next lunch is on you lol! or u could just buy me that really nice jacket *evades eye contact* u know the one i'm talking abouttt lol)

yeah tiring day... though most of the time i was sitting down.. it's still damn tiring! rar! (but some of the competitors in the ARC competition thingum can really sing... (though some were mediocre the rest of em were pretty good.. though all that money talk and watever they present will bore anyone's socks off... Hmm wonder how the judges tahan... tsk tsk)
then the whole lot of us (xiuqi, qammie, singwei, zech and the crew jj, lam, jerry and me) went to catch letters of Iwo Jima... (no lam u're not always infront hurhurhur)
pretty good show overall... *warning!* it's about 2hrs and 15 mins long yah yah.. but entertaining nonetheless...

first tape's now at 15mins.. my god another 25 to go before i change tape.. and i've still gotta export the 100+ photos taken by mr.photographer jerry.. (kill me!) .. and then i've to wake up early tmr to return the stupid cam to the cage in school.. (kill me 2 times over?) i'm feeling that feeling again.. u know.. the one that makes ur eyelids feel like they weigh a ton and makes ur legs wobbly as if they could give way.. yahh tired,, i need sleeeeep lol

i still want my good food!!! lol
pleaseeeeee! someone go with me to the village or something.. or sizzler? =P or we could help qammie with the chalet thing and we could order pizza or just have a good old fashion bbq (but i'm not cooking this time =P) i'm going to eat and chilllll yah yah...

still looking for a nice song to put up here to reflect how i feel right now.. maybe later... after i get enough guts to touch my laptop.. just scared to lag the darn thing...

okie gotta go.. my feet stink(=P).. probably go shower meself in lovely steamy hot water..
yaya.. au-revoir!

away, away...

the puddle on the road that's been shrinking in the sun...

give me a couple more weeks.. and i promise it'll never happen again...
beauty of the foolishly determined human mind...
give me a couple more weeks... and all i can say is 'i remember...'



man gives up his seat...
mum: 'And what must you say?'
boy: "Thank you :)"
*man nods with a smile..*

jumble, rumble, tumble...

the days you feel like shit..
the days you feel like shit and wanna be someone else...
the days you wanna be someone else bcoz of the many nonsensical and stupid things you've done...
the days you wanna be someone else bcoz you wanna start from scratch coz life's not perfect, and it 'could have, should have, would have' been...
face down in the dirt too afraid to look up and see everything in slow-mo'ed in black and white.. is anybody gonna help you to your feet?
maybe if you were someone else...

bonehead choices, tough decisions, and a whole lot of running away..

i've finally started writing my first song :D...
it's still kinda furry round the edges.. loads more work to do.. kinda hard to find the right words oui oui..
hopefully it'll come out nice and people will like it.. :P

on a slightly depressing note,
i fell today and guess where? yep on my left shoulder..
looks like this season's over for me.. :( ..
damn dumb.. *smmmmack*

i've been having cravings for good food lately :P haha..
don't know.. not been feeling so blur lately either.. (dohhhh)
*Craving for salmon*

sunburn's been getting better.. think i'm a couple of shades darker now lol..
(As if i wasn't tanned enough..)

miss my old phone which i have yet to bring to repair..
it's still smashed up and everything.. =/ ..


how does "a waiting dog die" leh?
je ne sais pas... *shrug*
lonesome and left out in the rain...

heeeee... i wanna eat churros! :D

my greatest fear...

i'm beginning to hate falling asleep...
i'm beginning to hate dreaming...
why isit i see the things i do?
the things that drive me crazy, and make me feel like a fool.
why the details?
the painful details that linger in my mind that i see everytime i close my eyes.
why can i not wake before it ends?
it's eating me up inside,
pushing me away to the sides.
i hope you'll never feel the sadness of waking in the morning,
of being all alone, and the silence that come with it.
i hope you'll never wait dearly for things to happen.
they never do. the phone never rings for the right reasons, the rain won't cease,
and no one will be there waiting, with an umbrella.
the secret plans that fail and are then hidden from your sight to protect you.
maybe you won't mind all of this, but the pain i get from it is indescribable.
this is my fear, of being half a world away...

----------

i saw the little girl cry, and i couldn't help but feel it was my fault and i could have done something.

training later.. finally going after a long absence..
coach will probably kill me... my shoulder will probably kill me.. but i don't want to stay home...
home isn't feeling like it used to anymore..
damn tired but everytime i see my bed i get sick of it.. tskk. *hates*

*tired of typing*

(mao's running out of titles for his posts)

*Secret Garden - Half A World Away*

You're half a world away
Standing next to me
It seems that every day
I'm loosing you almost invisibly
Though you are near
I can't reach that far
Across to where you are
And so you stay
Just half a world away

And I would coss
The universe for you
What good would it do
If you weren't even there?
Till you return
And untill your way is clear
I will be here
Not half a world away

You're half a world away
And noone is to blame
If love outlives its day
And turns into an ember from a flame
I love you as before
Till words will be nomore
Till I can't find a way
To where you stay
Just half a world away

(Repeat chorus)

You're half a world away

--------

yeah pretty much in love with this song at the moment.. didn't know it was in my iTunes.. (did u send this me smiley lady? hur don't remember .. think it was you.. btw.. any new songs? :D.. haven't chatted with you in a long time yeah yeah..
gardener no longer knows what he's supposed to be tending haha..)

*Imagine*

mom- Ah zai! (canto for "Son/Boy") Faiti hoi seck fan! ("quick! go eat!").. i left the box on the tab.... Lei hum zo mut? Mut yeh? (why are you crying? what's wrong?)

boy- *snuffle* nothing... the song i'm listening to hen touching...

mom- Qi seen ah lei! ("You crazy idiot!")

i just want that something more that i've yet to find i guess... no worries.. this 'overaged teenager' has still got abit of youth in him left haha.. (stupid sw and your 'overaged teenager' lol.. *smmmmmack!*

slap in the face...

wake up melvin!
tskkk..
i know why i've been so depressed lately already!! because i've been too serious!
too serious about everything! tskk no moreeee..
gonna chill moreeee... throw away my serious face.. ouiiiii..
laughed like i haven't in awhile as i was watching lethal weapon 3 on ch5 hahah..
comedyyyyyy! :D

don't wait for happiness to come to you,
get up off your fat ass and go find it.

want so many things
wanna learn so much =D
and wanna make money haha...

learn photography and photoshop from derrick
go take first aid course for my coaching cert..
get a coaching job which comes with 45 buckeroos an hour pay (Muahhahhahaa)
start training floorball seriously again..
pick up either ice hockey or field hockey..
get a 'humungo' bag so i can bring my dslr and laptop and stuff everywhere i go..
bring my dslr and take 'merde'-loads of photos..
start singing again....
record more songs...
write my own songs..
find a singing job :P (as lam suggested).. the last one i applied for was a bloody hoax tskkk.. idiots in this world and the fools like me who believe them hahaa...
write the script for 'FSV: The Musical'! hahaha and make it a killer one...
(damn fun zomg! as dx would put it)
change my style.. hurhur (no idea to what yet..)
pierce my lip =X hahahahhahaha (and get murdered by my mum lol)
get contact lenses! :D
get ubber cool custom sports googles..
braces! :D
FRENCH! wanna continue french!
Italian!
Spanish! (that's it for now luh.. dun wanna kill myself)
get an Acoustic Guitar!!! =D *faints*
hit the gym and get fit hurhur.. (work the fat off and get myself a 6-pack muahahhahaa hen aggro) do running.. think i'll go now hahahaha jog around estate lolcrazy mofo meee...
TW!!! Phone me when u're exams are done man! i wanna see ur guitar!!! i wanna record more songs!!! I'm rotting at homeeeeee!!! *hates*
eat proper food!!! :D tsk! (my diet's so screwed up... i can survive on 2 paos for an entire day!!!? freaking scary.. even finishing both paos at one go are giving me a problem tskkkkk)

KK going overboard alreadyyy yes i shall do jogging later.. (so what if it's midnight ahhaha..)
dunno if i should go for my floorball game tomorrowwwww ahhh dilema!
shoulder isn't all too good but i'm feeling energetic lol

new song! =D
*Now Playing Shiny Toy Guns - Starts With One*

starts with one
i can't feel
its all in your mind anyway..
i can't heal
..make me feel this way

now there's two
i can't see
i've never felt this way
i can't feel
anything anyway...

lets show them
the only way
lets show them
our hearts

only three
i can't seem
to get enough anyway
i can't speak
nothing to say anyway

lets show them
the only way
lets show them our hearts
lets sew up their hearts ..

distorted light moves in
or am i mistaken?

it feels so cold

there goes today ...
it slowly fades ..
slowly fades away.

here comes today
never go away.......

*snoreeeeeee* men si ren le!

finally got the red box outta my fridge.. u guys wanna see what's inside?

(i have pictures.. =D)
*Please bear in mind that i was and am still really bored thus my free time for all the lovely bullshit you're about to witness (if i do say so myself haha) SFOY!*

nice? =D haha.. but pretty boring.. just a plain lit candle on a "Crappy/Sappy" brownie as labelled by the icing (hurhur)

then the stupid box CAUGHT FIRE!!! *runs around in panic*
kinda looks like an alligator head (not my initial intention but i'll take the credit all the same hurhur.. =P )
can see? it's looking towards the left of the screen.. kinda ugly.. (Wye u care?!)

i've no idea what i was doing here.. jsut felt like twirling the camera around abit to see what i'd get...

My favourite picture with my initial (M) =D nice nice??
hurhur.. *loves*

J'adore ca... =D

(mel) the reason why lam calls me the director's god-son hahhahaha.. You fool know!
yah yah the L behind looks like an 'E' also ... (WYE U CARE! x2)

i call this one "GhostRider and his fiery chain"
hahaha..

Starry, starry night....

"Shot through the heart! And you're to blame!

You give love, a bad name!"

was going for an arrow through a heart... oui oui..

<3

monsieur french snowman *salutes*
Au-revoir tout le monde! =D

'dream, child... dream'

someone's here with me..
telling me... to close my eyes.. and let go..
let sleep consume me.. and go to the world where anything is possible..

is this a dream? if it is.. please don't wake me from this high
forget all and what they seem, leave them behind, stretch these arms out and fly...
away, away far from confusion and sadness...
this is the path you were meant to follow...

hope in the world... =)

so cute right? hahaha..
sometimes i think we rely on little things like this to cheer us up..
it doesn't matter if their friendship only lasts 3 months..
hurr... really.. don't u just love animals?
u can read bout the full story hereee (and see em play o'course)

hurrrr and yes dx.. Livin on a prayer is hardcore hahahaha..

She says, "We've gotta hold on to what we've got,
'Cause it doesn't make a difference
if we make it or not.
We've got each other and that's a lot
For love - we'll give it a shot

Woahhhh, We're Halfway There!
Woahhh! Livin' On A Prayer!
Take my hand and we'll make it I swear
Woahhh! Livin' On A Prayer!

=D

for love, for love...

nightmare of things now, then and maybe tomorrow...

a planned outing of friends...
everyone was there.. everyone we knew...
and it seemed that each time there was the slightest chance of contact,
i somehow managed to slip away...
i'd have thought it wouldn't matter to you anyway...
but then you called.. and asked for a chat..
no.. u didn't ask for a chat.. u asked for an argument..
the perfect way of resolving problems between people... because everything is let loose...
all that has ever wanted to be said and done is finally told, shown.. no longer withheld in your mind...
too perfect i though.. it couldn't have happened in real life.. it doesn't work like that in life...
we don't ask for an argument to solve things anymore..
we just let 'bygones be bygones'.. things of the past that should be forgotten..not worthy of rememberance...
but yes.. i wanted a better tomorrow.. one where everything would be understood.. for the better or worse..
but i saw your insecurities right away.. you brought friends... dragged the probelm out and involved individuals who really didn't matter.. but who have the power to change the outcome.. change the reasons behind actions and words..
i asked for a change of location.. a place where we'd be able to chat.. just you and me..
for a moment it seemed it'd worked.. but your friends.. they wouldn't have it... and you did nothing to stop their poking..
you gave your question... one that i'm sure u've been preparing.. and i said..
"Anger, Jealousy, Loneliness, Frustration, Pride and Over-Confidence.."
that's where it ended..
because we were disturbed once again..
no, not by one of your friends..
by one of mine.. he spat at the situation from above us.. and took it all as a joke..
his hysterical laughing.. mocking my every move.. and i couldnt take it anymore..
the monster within reared it's ugly head.. and everything just went downhill from there..
form the first chair thrown.. to him holding up his hands covered in his own blood..
and still.. laughing..
i tried to get help.. but the authorities wouldn't believe me.. just how many times have i 'cried wolf'?
and then i called myself.. by a different name.. one of extreme significance.. i became him..
with the sad, gloomy eyes... and a entire hidden world of unpleasant situations within him..
and i knew what it meant..
i knew you'd fade away eventually..

-------

funny how dreams use people you actually know to represent things...
everything has a meaning.. if only you look at what lies beneath...
everytime i open my fridge i see that big red box.. (yes it's still there..) i havent't opened it since that day.. a pretty depressing sight.. but i think i'll take a picture and get rid of it soon..
things u don't need to know.. because they shouldn't matter...

hurr.. calvin and i are having plans to make a musical haha i think it's got potential.. hurhur
"FSV: The Musical" will help show the world what fsv students go through in school.. the many worries and problems we face in life.. and how our personal lives are also brought into the picture..hurhur.. sounds cool can't wait to get started on it..

production for our singtel commercial is finally over.. it's been a long week.. and for the first time in awhile, i'm sitting at home with nothing to do hurhurhur.. DAMN BORINGGG!!!
Somebody save me!!!! rar!
not going for sunday's game i guess because i really F*&^ed up my left shoulder during production :( really stupid because i can't even tie my shoelaces without feeling discomfort luhh..
and i can't sleep on my left side anymore because of it.. i can't play floorball because i can't shoot! i had a taste of it in valhall yesterday when i couldn't resist having a shot or two hurhur.. (and i'm regretting it now! )
and had heartburn yesterday thanks to my lousy meal times..
i'm getting stress induced chest pains and heartburn at the same time.. @.@
and my right knee cap was funny.. tsk..
seeeee so much to complain about... =P
and there's still so much more i'd like to say! but no..
oooooo momma just brought food back so i'm going to go eat my breakfast.. (yes at 5pm) hur hur... cya people!

the dual personalities return...

"so what do you want?"
'Hmm well i was thinking if everything goes well... yah.. '
"yah?"
'Yah.... '
"Details! Duhhhh!"
'... but... i don't know what i want anymore.. '
"how can you not know what you want you fool!"
'don't know...'
"DON'T KNOW AGAIN?!"
'guess it's just one of those things luhh... what the heck u want me to do? tsk...'
"well at least be confident and sure! Know what the hell you want man!"
'kay fine! what do you want then?'
"... hmmmm... mmmmm.... "
'see you don't know what you want either?! THEN HOW?!'

-----

if only things went according to plan just that one day...
the don't knows and ifs are coming back, just like they did not long ago..

he picks ups his mask that's been faithful to him all this while..
helped him through the self-torment and torture the last time...
maybe.. maybe it'll happen again...
maybe.. maybe i'll ignore everything again...

bonne nuit tout le monde...

Mao's guide to preventing muscle cramps *wink*

okay.. lately.. i've been hearing of and seeing people around me complain about/ get cramps
(people like joannamoo, lam (and his crazy 4th toe hahahah), my brother and a few others..)
now i'm gonna give all of you lucky people a simplified explanation as to why you get cramps, and hopefulyy u'll learn enough of this post to help prevent you from getting cramps... =D

okie dokie.. here we go basics..
our muscles are made up of millions of fibers.. think of it as 'Big Pipes'
and in those 'Big Pipes' (BP for ease of reference), there are millions of 'Medium Pipes' (MP), and in those 'MP's there are millions of 'Small Pipes' (let's call em Petite Pipes or PP hurr cause i love french =P) ...
so yes our muscles basically consists of fibres or 'PP's that is wrapped in a connective sheath of tissue that holds the muscle together as a whole... c'est simple non?

also know that muscles are connected to our bones with the help of our tendons..

now how do muscles contract....
muscles contract simply because your mind sends a command down ur nervous system to your muscles telling them to 'stiffen up' or contract.. and by doing so, as them muscle shortens, it pulls on the tendon which then pulls the muscle in whichever direction yaya...

now why do u get muscle cramps..
1. Insufficient Salt (will explain..)
2. Physical Fitness

why isit you get muscle cramps when u have insufficent salt content in your body you get cramps?
now "How do muscles relax" *most important section* =P

before a muscle can return to it's original length when it's relaxed, this funny things called the "Myosin Heads" must (in a way) "let go" of the muscles..
these myosin heads require salts such as Calcium and wat not to "relax" and let of the muscle fibre... it is almost like how it's difficult to move a rusted metal hinge and oil is required to smooth it out.. the salts we consume play the "oil" role with our muscles...

other reasons for muscles cramps would be a lack of physical fitness...
u more often then not find yourself having cramps after an extremely straneous day and u feel completely dead.. u put your feet up and after awhile u get those nasty cramps...
this happens especially if you haven't exercised that much prior to that tiring day yaya... your muscles wouldn't have in a way gotten that used to being worked and here you are, overworking it all of a sudden..

also before u go and do a heavy work out, remember to have a wee bit of salt intake such as drinking a Isotonic drink like gatorade or h-two-o... (works for me.. =P)
and do your warm-up stretches... this helps prepare the muscles for exercise by increasing their flexibility slightly and helps prevent muscle injuries...
and after exercising do a wee bit of cool down stretches.. this is very important as it helps to increase the speed of recovery for muscles (so that you won't ache all over for too long), it helps with the removal of lactic acid build up in our muscles ( a waste product created in muscle contraction), helps return the body to a resting state and, a plus point for doing stretches to after exercise to cool down is because it is the point where u can increase you flexibility range with greater ease... yaya.. and another bottle of h-two-o wouldn't do any harm.. (hurhur.. no they didn't hire me to do a commercial tsk... [though they should seriously consider giving me something in return hurhur =X])
but don't expect a couple of isotonic drinks to do the job.. u gotta have a pretty decent diet too.. u know all that fruits and veggies and watever.. (u can skip veggies like me if u want hurhur =X.. bad influence)

okie dokie! .. that's pretty much all i can remember at least =/.. if u feel like u wanna know more,
check this site out http://getbodysmart.com/ap/muscletissue/menu/animation.html...
(warning.. it's really cheemology..)

okie getting late.. gotta go turn in or i won't be able to wake up for tomorrow's production at valhall.. Bonne nuit tout le monde! =D