i can't...

i can't sleep...
because i can't understand...
i can't understand why i can't understand...
because i can't tell myself what to make of this...
because i can't stop over-thinking...
because i can't stop wanting answers
because i can't find the right answers...
because i can't think straight...
i can't CAN'T CAN'T
i just can't understand....
i just can't understand why won't you understand?
because you can't?
if i can't and you can't? then who in this universe can?
they can't...
they can't understand...
they can't see the elements of a bigger picture...
they can't change...
they can't get pass the exterior...
they can't see the good inside...
they can't see the pain inside...
they can't bother to look at anything other than what is infront of them...
they can't picture a different story...
they can't possibly know you can't...
because you can't say the right words...
because you can't...
and i can't tell you the words...
because i can't find the right words...
i can't even say them to myself...
because i can't take the bitter truths...
i can't hate
because i can't take pain of that magnitude anymore...
i simply can't...
and if you can't be that painkiller, and they can't ...
i can't escape the dark promise of the undying lands..
a eternity of can'ts....

maybe i can't say i can't go to sleep after this post...
just a self-reflecting post... i thought i'd get down.. so in the future i'll remember i used to say
I Can't...
but you can... =)